Take your time
There's no gentle version of this task. Somewhere between the funeral and the paperwork, you find yourself trying to get into a parent's email, or bank, or phone — and being told, politely, that you can't. It's a strange, lonely kind of stuck: the person is gone, and their digital life is still locked, still sending bills, still very much on.
This is a calm order to work through it in. None of it is urgent in the way grief makes everything feel urgent — take it a step at a time.
The official routes
They exist — they're just slow
Most large platforms have a legacy or estate process — a way for an executor to request access, memorialize, or close an account with the right documents. Banks and government services have their own. They work, eventually, but they're built for caution: expect forms, waits, and one death certificate consumed per institution.
Where you already hold a login and just need to settle affairs, that's often the faster path. Where you don't, the official route is usually the only one.
The honest, hard part: if a parent kept everything in their head or behind a phone you can't unlock, some of it may simply be unreachable. That's the lockout this whole category of tools exists to prevent — for you, later.
Where to start
Start with these three
You don't have to do everything at once. These three, in order, make almost everything else reachable.
Several certified copies of the death certificate, proof you're the executor or next of kin, and your own ID. Order the copies early — you'll need one per institution.
Email is the master key — resets, bills, and two-factor codes for almost everything route through it. Reach it and the rest becomes reachable.
Bank and cards, phone carrier, insurance, then subscriptions and social accounts — closing or memorializing each.
The kindest thing
Do it for your own family
If working through this taught you anything, it's that you don't want to leave the same puzzle behind. The fix is small — about an afternoon.
- →Decide who could get into your accounts if something happened to you.
- →Keep your important documents in one place.
- →Understand what happens to your accounts when you're gone.
Don't leave the puzzle behind
Simply Once keeps your identity, documents, and logins in one encrypted vault, with trusted access you set up in advance — so the people you love aren't locked out later.